Everyone knows someone who is in psychotherapy. Mental health practices, such as talking to a therapist or counselor, have become more and more socially accepted and less taboo, as going to therapy no longer regards you as “crazy.” While people go to speak to mental health professionals for many reasons, many also feel the need to go because it makes them feel more at ease to have someone, outside their family or friends, to speak to about anything and everything. Yet, there are still those comments and questions from people who are not in therapy, or haven’t been, that just should never be said. Here are just a few:
1. I bet they don’t even really listen.
As in many things that a lot of people are not familiar with, there are always skeptics. There is a misconception that therapists don’t even listen to their clients’ stories or concerns and instead just ask, “and how does that make you feel?” to allow the client motivation to continue uncovering the answers for themselves. For one, most therapists, good therapists anyway, listen and help their client reflect on their own thoughts. The objective of each session is for the individual to uncover their true feeling; for this, the therapist must observe the details in what is said and be as interactive or as silent as the client desires.
2. What’s the point in talking to a stranger?
What is spoken between someone and their therapist may be something several people already know, or something absolutely nobody knows about. That’s the beauty about speaking to a therapist or counselor; they will consistently listen to what’s going on in your life and help you assess it with a deeper understanding and less concern for a secret getting out.
3. What do you talk about?
This is understandable as a general question but should not be asked if specific details are expected. An individual in therapy could by all means tell you as much or as little as they wish about what they really talk about.
4. Can you ask them this for me?
This is not your therapy session, go get your own.
5. It’s not worth the money.
Something’s worth is decided upon by each individual. No one truly knows everything about what goes on in someone’s life and mind and how they feel about it. If someone decides to spend their time and money on therapy it’s because they deemed this valuable to their mental health.
6. I like to solve my own problems.
To begin, inferring that someone can’t solve their own problems or that they look to other’s to do so is simply rude and judgmental -plus, this makes the person who says it look as if they think they’re better. Solutions to problems do not come in a set number of sessions or may not even necessarily come at all, but therapy sessions allow for a person to see his or her life in a wide scope and potentially feel more at ease about a concern, thus being healthier. Furthermore, no one can decide for anyone whether they need therapy as it is a personal decision.
Via Flickr/Chris Frewin
